Control

People who fear loss of control can be harmful. People spend so much of their lives seeking ways to control the outside world, they lose themselves and exist unsatisfied. Unhappy. Every day is an overwhelming task as people lug around a list of unnecessary duties which cloud the mind. They seek power over nations, leaders, work, communities, peers, children, partners, bosses, schools, laws, animals, traffic, the weather, or ever fate, luck, karma or anything else you may believe in.

Genuine understanding of control is recognizing the only thing we do have control over: our mind. The mind can never be manipulated or taken away completely. We still have choices of how to respond and behave towards hat happens around us. Our bodies are not even in full control of one person. We can be struck, assaulted, imprisoned, fall ill, be attacked, succumb to a fate that we have not created. The world continues to spin and other people continue to make their own choices. Sometimes this seems scary. That fear can be countered or balanced with the power we do have: our thoughts.

When things happen we control our opinions of them. We have control over choices. We can choose to be mean, fair, good, rude, honest, belligerent, etc. Knowing and understanding this true control can offer clarity and relieve one of unnecessary stresses. Remind yourself of what is out of your control and where your choice begins and ends. There is simplicity when the amount of things you feel you need to think about is reduced.

Selectivity

Peace is important. Protecting your peace is important.

The internet, as valuable a tool it is during this era, can cause one to feel overwhelmed, helpless, angry, saddened, spiteful, unsure, and afraid. We are connected to almost everyone, everywhere, and the unfortunate events of our world are given a brighter light as they lead to more attention for the organizations that share such news. It is important to be ignorant of some things; to be selective of what information you seek and wish to delve into; to be selective of the sources you use and whom you listen to; to be selective of what you will invest your time in, what conversations you will be actively involved in, and what activities to participate in. Selective ignorance can save your sanity.

To be ignorant is not to be stupid or incompetent. It is simple not knowing. One does not need to know what celebrity is getting married tomorrow, what famous person is having a fight with three of their partners, what internet personality is giving a tour of their home. Much violence is occurring within the world and we must be aware of certain dangers, however, this does not need to be an everyday thing. Some days, closing off from the negative energy can keep you from getting consumed by darkness, to the point of losing faith in the world. Activities that do not contribute should be removed from your life. People who drain you of energy should be removed from your life. Topics that have been presented to distract you and take your attention from things that matter should be pushed aside. When you are able to do this, you are able to recognize the opportunities for growth, development, and evolution. True knowledge will come, and true wisdom will assist in setting you free.

Remember…

Potential has no limit,

Max E James

Cognizant

Another month into 2021 and getting pretty close to 2022 as we enter the holidays. I hope you are all staying safe and looking out for one another. As the holidays near, many of us may feel just as isolated and alone as we did last year during the shut down(s). It is important we have people to go to when we feel, for lack of a better term, not ourselves. When we do go out and spend time with family and friends, after a few drinks we can get a little antsy, and we lose sight of what the “truth” is.

It is important to recognize our perspectives are going to be different from others because of our upbringing, the information we have up to the moment of a discussion, and beliefs. Our minds take in everything we hear, see, feel, smell, and taste, and actually altars it.

This isn’t a course on how the mind works. I simply want you to recognize that we all have different views, and this has actually allowed our society to evolve and allowed a lot of progression within our communities. Taking the time to listen to other people may help in educating us what their “truth” is, as it does not necessarily mean they are wrong. I could be missing a lot of information that others have, therefore my approach is different, and my idea of how things should be done is different as well.

We are always allowed to change our mind.

Remember…potential has no limit.

Keep growing.

Remember

Hey everyone!

I hope you all have been staying safe and healthy, taking care of yourselves and looking out for one another.

2021 really felt weird for me. The first couple months seemed to drag, then summer felt like it came and went, now we’re into fall and it seems to be going at a slower pace as everyone prepares for the holidays. Many of us are still recovering from what was 2020, and most people are still feeling the affects all that’s happened over the pass eighteen plus months. One can argue that nothing will be the same or go back to what was once considered normal.

Even with everything that has gone on, and even has left quite an impact in my personal life, there has been a lot of opportunity to reflect, learn, and grow throughout the pass couple years. I hope you were able to take advantage of that opportunity. With moments of pause within the pass year, we have all been given a chance to reflect on our lives, recognize where we are, where we want to be, what we want to do, and who we want to be.

Please know that I am here for anyone that needs a shoulder to lean on or someone to just vent to. I am only human and do not have all the answers and may not have all the advice, but I will always be available to listen and learn. It is important to have someone there that you can rely on and trust. It can be more than one person, and you could even choose to only allow each person access to only certain parts of your life. Either way, please speak with someone about how you are feeling, even the good. It is always nice when someone can hear your accomplishments and good days, and who can share their own.

Take care of each other.

Remember, potential has no limit.

Choose Who You Will Be Today

I spoke with someone who appears to have given up, at least with what they are currently dealing with. This individual feels incapable of changing their current situation, and has accepted, or claims to have accepted, what people think of him. This individual has potential, but lacks self-esteem, and has a feeling the world is against him. He believes he has no power to change what he is currently going through. Because of this he refuses to make an effort to change. It is not complacency, per say, because he is not happy with his current situation and would prefer change. He has, however, surrendered his mind to the opinions and words of others.

One day, I presented an opportunity to him. I was not going to be upset or disappointed if he chose not to take it, but his response made me uneasy. He felt there was no point to take advantage of his opportunity because people have already decided the type of person he is and what he will end up doing or being in the near future.

First impressions can be quite important but should never be the end all. People will have their moments and could be in another place in their mind, dealing with their own stress. I would never excuse certain behaviors, however, we often times forget other people have their own lives and stresses. Meeting someone for the first time should not always require immediate judgement.

I spoke with this person and told them this: Not everyone will like you, and you will never be able to make everyone like you. In trying to, you will end up losing yourself. Even if you change for the better or worse, many people will base their perceptions of you on what they used to know about you. A lot of people will criticize you changing or wanting to change, any times because this change does not benefit them. Still, this should not prevent you from improving. What others say of you should never deter you from seeking better for yourself, even if others continue to try to define you. If you want to be better, do better. You know what needs to get done. Work on yourself, starting with small steps. One thing I have learned, who you choose to be today will have a much greater affect on your future than who you were yesterday.

Potential has no limit.

Part 2 (Balance)

Let’s continue the talk on complacency, being comfortable, being grateful with where we are and where we want to be. I would like to differentiate comfort, which is accepting or being happy with one’s current life but wanting to progress, and complacency, which is having little to no desire to change the current way. At times. this may mean they have established a safety net so that they can keep what they currently have, while working to improve themselves in some form. Being comfortable does not mean to settle. It can go hand in hand with an aspiring soul that is motivated and ambitious for a better life. You can still strive for change, prepare for it, and be in a position that you are happy and/or comfortable with.

People who are complacent, many times, are afraid of change. Many do not prepare for change because they refuse to accept it, however, the world is changing and will continue to. As a whole, we may not like change because it requires effort from us, and adapting to new circumstances we may or may not want. Sometimes that means doing things we may prefer not to do, because we may be lazy, lack motivation, or takes time away from other things. This is what many complacent people focus on: what they could lose, not what can be gained. They do not seek value in new or change because of uncertainty and no guarantees of getting as much pleasure as their current life. Even with so much change coming in the near future, and it being inevitable, many complacent people will continue complaining instead of trying to adapt, focusing on negatives of what could change, not considering the benefits that come from change. The possibility that something bad can come from change is what can lead to complacency, causing someone to ignoring the good. Not all change is good, but not all change is preventable.

Comfortable people will accept change, and move towards the change because they choose to. The ambitious can be comfortable. Others are okay with good enough.

Balance (Where you are, where you want to be)

“Wherever you are isn’t good enough'“ - Jordan Peterson

There is a conflict that can develop in you when wanting better while also desiring to be grateful of what you have, and knowing to be grateful with where you currently are. Sometimes, or for some people, this can create a sense of hypocrisy. It is understandable, but do not take yourself away from that someone can be comfortable at a moment in time while pursuing something greater. There are those who have a level of complacency, which is satisfaction of their current position, with few objections, and little desire or motivation to change their current life situation. A “situation” is not to imply a bad thing.

So many people stay where they are, and we have witnessed it, experienced it, maybe going through it, yet so many of those people are unknowingly complacent or not at all. So many may claim to want more, want better, complain about certain situations, are unhappy with what they have or do not have, yet continue to live as if where they is what they can settle with. Here’s the thing: where A LOT of people are is good enough. It is better than where they may have been before, maybe better than the lives of others around them. Yes, however, there are some issues I have. One is, “it can always be worse.” It can also be better. Almost everywhere we go, school, work, the store, home, club, parks, there is someone complaining about something they could change, something they want to do but choose not to, yet there is no motivation or action to change the changeable. A lo of that has to do with fear, and some level of complacency.

Jordan Peterson said, “Wherever you are isn’t good enough.” This is good, because you have some level of motivation or desire to do better, get better, and “good enough” just leads someone to have nothing left except watch television until the end of time. We are unable to live this way because without a sense of purpose, without giving the mind something to solve or work on, we enter a state of autopilot and lack of progress. Insufficiency drives people to work towards what they define as success.

Complacency is accepted because it keeps the majority where they are, and it is easy to do. Not falling into that idea can be a challenge, especially as one ages, as one starts family. That is when differentiating complacency from comfort becomes critical.

Self-Image

Take the time (a day, maybe a week) to pay attention to how you describe yourself to others; pay attention to how you to and about yourself. What you say about yourself out loud, to yourself or others, and how you talk about yourself can tell others and yourself about self-image.

What appears to be quite common within our society is the lack of distinction between humility and self-deprecation. Some feel they may come off conceited if they express how positive they feel or how well they so at something. There is a stigma behind certain levels of confidence, pride, and self-worth. A mindset develops to avoid feeling a certain way or getting a certain amount of confidence. There are those who are over-confident and have arrogance. Eventually it shows. The difference between arrogance and confidence becomes clear over time. Confidence, when genuine, does not void any humility. To be humble does mean belittle your value, your ideas, yours actions, your successes, your words, or even your accomplishments. So many do not recognize how common it is to devalue one’s own beliefs.

The subconscious is such a powerful thing; it can be influenced without a person’s awareness. It stores what we believe and feel, as well as what we put out. Your behavior can tell a lot about how you see yourself. If you tell someone, “I am not good,” after they compliment how well you play a game, eventually your approach to the game is affected (and people might stop complimenting you because your negative responses).

Please, do not start portraying narcissism. Do not go around boasting about how great you are, how skilled you are, or how much you have succeeded over others. Everyone can improve. Everyone can be better. The best still study, show up for practice, research, and learn. Experts still study and review. Technology improves because it can always be better.

To use wording that lowers your own value can lower your worth in the eyes of others as well. You may not be the top player but you are able to improve, and you are obviously good enough to be on the team. How about, instead of downplaying what you have done and criticizing your actions, think of what you did well and what you can improve on. Instead of basing your worth on what others think, look at yourself. Recognize and appreciate the things about yourself that are incredible. When you get complimented think of why someone likes your work, or how well you dressed, and appreciate that aspect of yourself. Acknowledge your strengths, and your ability to develop more. Take note of the good things, no matter how trivial they may be. You make one hell of a sandwich, and you are always the first to get ready for events or dates.

Once you take note of what you say to yourself and about yourself to others, then change that thinking, a lot more will change.

"Right Time"

You have an idea for a book, an idea for a vlog, you want to start exercising. There is a problem though: you feel “too busy”; you don’t know if you will be able to finish the book because you need a clean space to focus, or you work so many hours. The vlog will not be good enough because you feel there is not enough interesting stuff going on int your life. You think you have to figure out a good amount of material before starting, or you fear people may not like it. You don’t want to start working out until the beginning of the week. Since it is Tuesday you think “I’ll wait till the start of next week.” Maybe you do not know what to do. This is me pointing out that so many people are waiting for the “right time.” People are waiting for things to line up. Waiting for certain situations to surpass; some feel once there are no other worries, that is the moment. What ends up happening? If it is not an internal issue, it is something to do with family, work, and finances. Now the world must wait for the person to become what they need to become or create for the world.

Right now, while you are breathing, while you are alive, while you are capable…that is the right time. Tomorrow is not promised. Next week is not guaranteed. Anything can happen between now and then. No mater what you do, obstacles will exist. Life is not as predictable as some may believe. Struggles will happen and obstacles will continue to appear. Problems will arise. How you deal with them will matter very much. With something always happening, people trying to hold you down, situations occurring, your own habits trying to keep you in place, why are you waiting and not starting now? Is it lack of resources? You are resourceful. Is it fear that something will happen? You are capable of dealing with it. Now is the time to start. Not tomorrow, not next week. Now. “What if it isn’t good?” Are you basing what is good off of what you think good should be or what you hope others will perceive as good? You cannot please everyone, and no matter how hard you try, you never will, and will end up over working yourself. The hardest part is typically starting. Thing is, starting is not difficult at all. People just lack discipline, motivation, and ambition. No one becomes a pro on their first go.

So, what are you waiting for?

Potential Has No LImit

Achieving Pt. 2

Creating purpose. Lack of purpose is why so many are without drive or motivation. Having no reason to accomplish makes the desire to accomplish pointless, and that is when people get no pleasure or satisfaction from taking steps towards a goal. We need a ''why.”

Why am I doing anything I am doing? What reason do I write, record, or do anything to do with Potential Has No Limit? I have my reasons. You should know yours if you want to achieve. Creating a purpose for what you want to accomplish gives you some energy and can build motivation to strive. Without knowing why, a lot of people move blindly, many times without meaning, without an end goal, without knowing where they are going or what to expect. Knowing your why can get you through bumps on the road and help with planning. Knowing your why can help in realizing what you thought you wanted does not really matter to you or is not important enough. This can also help in directing you towards what means more to you.

You determine your purpose. It does not have to seem grand to anyone else. Maybe, you decided your purpose is to be a great parent because you want your child or children to grow healthy, happy, and intelligent. It is possible you want to be an accomplished teacher because education is very important, and the youth are our future. Having a positive impact on children may be all you want. That is having a purpose, having a why.

Having a purpose and being aware can develop more conscious living and action. You realize what must be done, where you must go. Planning is important, but self-awareness is imperative to knowing what goals to set for yourself. Once you recognize your purpose and have the “why” you are better at filtering the nonsense, knowing what is important and brings value to your life, and what is unnecessary. You can start developing a passion and a drive to keep pushing beyond what one may have thought possible from you.

Potential Has No Limit

Basic Steps

I hope whatever challenge you are currently faced with is overcome, and you grow through each moment in life. What you define as success I hope you continue your pursuit towards it and never settle for anything less than what you believe you are worth.

One step towards accomplishing goals is changing your mindset from seeking approval and permission from everyone, only taking into consideration feedback and advice. This is not to say ignore other people’s ideas, comments, or perspective, but to ensure it does not create such an affect on you that you make decisions only off what others say.

This week has been busy, and feels long, but it just started for me. I started vlogging, which turns out to be quite fun, and currently going through a program for military personnel separating. There are quite a few stresses, but I manage by giving time to myself, spending time with friends, separating myself from technology for a few moments, and ensuring that my actions on this path lead to my desires. You should do the same.

Potential has no limit.

Max E. James